www.ultimatehandyman.co.uk

Bread has possibilities as a toilet roll substitute - just go steady on the butter

In the woods, with the woodsmen

Doritos have an almost symbiotic relationship with Pringles, find the Pringles and the Doritos won't be far away.

Newspaper is a cheap substitute for Bog Roll, when I was a nipper the Daily Herald was torn into squares and put on a spike in the outside loo, we had an inside loo as well, but Bronco and Izal weren't much better than the DH.

Many years ago my mate ended up at the Docs (he used newspaper on a site where there was rarely any proper stuff) and was advised to stop using The Times, their particular ink was burning his bumhole.

Chippo1 wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 11:20 am In the woods, with the woodsmen

Well they would be in the woods wouldn't they.
I thought everyone would know that they grow on trees, but only where the wild haggis lives.

Go for a poo , jump in shower , job done and cleared up!

I believe Dorito trees have a symbiotic relationship with spaghetti trees.

Chippo1 wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 1:01 pm I believe Dorito trees have a symbiotic relationship with spaghetti trees.

Yes, it's pasta joke. . .

There is also a virus affecting the Ragu Berry

Chippo1 wrote: ↑Tue Mar 17, 2020 2:44 pm There is also a virus affecting the Ragu Berry

Can you state a source for that?

It came directly from Queue Gardens

Ah! Everyone knows by now then.
That place is like a greenhouse.

I have my TP backup (one page at a time, otherwise it might get uncomfortable)