My many injuries
Posted: Sat Jan 05, 2013 3:10 am
My many work related and none work related injuries first:
When i was still in school i worked in a factory that bagged compost and now and again the conveyor belt that carried the full bags to the pallets got stuck so you had to put your hands underneath and pull it to get it going again, did this once and didnt quite get my left hand out in time before it was nipped by the roller at the end or the belt and my hand went round the roller too, result: 4 broken fingers and a badly sprained wrist.
Just after i left school i worked in a restaurant kitchen and we used to slice the roast meat up for sunday dinner after saturday night shift had finished, this was the last job on a saturday night so was always done in a rush but unfortunately on one night i rushed too much, and the meat folder on the meat slicer and i ran my thumb down the blade, all the way from the tip to the knuckle down to the bone.
Playing football i was running with the ball, someone knocks me from the side trying to tackle me and i stood on the ball with my left foot, my foot rolls off the ball and all my weight lands on the side of my foot and this was astro turf not grass, result is a broken ankle, knackered ligaments tendons and swelling and bruising from my knee to the end of my toes.
6 broken noses from a mixture of rugby and mixed martial arts, it seems to bleed whenever it wants now.
Stripped most of the skin off the back of my hand after dropping a spoon into a pan of melted buter.
Plaster in the eye twice while plastering ceilings
Near misses:
Cutting MDF with a circular saw, blade guard jams open with dust, put saw down on top of sheet of MDF i had just cut next to my left hand and saw skids over the timber but luckily front of the base plate hits my wrist and stops.
Cross hatching panels on front walls of a house so we could gun it off to get it flush with rest of masonry before dashing a house, i was at the top of a ladder with a stihl saw above my head and the ladder slips, not much maybe only a couple of inches, still did the job of scaring me senseless!
Finish using grinder to cut tile and put it down upside down while still spinning, falls over and skates across ground and hits my steel toe cap.
sorting through 1200 x 900mm 30mm+ slabs of limestone stacked on end against a wall, pulled a fair few forward to see what was in the stack and balancing them on end, pulled one forward too hard and the whole lot starts to fall towards me, luckily they were stacked in a small room and pinned me against the wall behind me, would have been nasty if they had landed on me.
Thats all i can remember for now but i'm sure there have been a few more!
When i was still in school i worked in a factory that bagged compost and now and again the conveyor belt that carried the full bags to the pallets got stuck so you had to put your hands underneath and pull it to get it going again, did this once and didnt quite get my left hand out in time before it was nipped by the roller at the end or the belt and my hand went round the roller too, result: 4 broken fingers and a badly sprained wrist.
Just after i left school i worked in a restaurant kitchen and we used to slice the roast meat up for sunday dinner after saturday night shift had finished, this was the last job on a saturday night so was always done in a rush but unfortunately on one night i rushed too much, and the meat folder on the meat slicer and i ran my thumb down the blade, all the way from the tip to the knuckle down to the bone.
Playing football i was running with the ball, someone knocks me from the side trying to tackle me and i stood on the ball with my left foot, my foot rolls off the ball and all my weight lands on the side of my foot and this was astro turf not grass, result is a broken ankle, knackered ligaments tendons and swelling and bruising from my knee to the end of my toes.
6 broken noses from a mixture of rugby and mixed martial arts, it seems to bleed whenever it wants now.
Stripped most of the skin off the back of my hand after dropping a spoon into a pan of melted buter.
Plaster in the eye twice while plastering ceilings
Near misses:
Cutting MDF with a circular saw, blade guard jams open with dust, put saw down on top of sheet of MDF i had just cut next to my left hand and saw skids over the timber but luckily front of the base plate hits my wrist and stops.
Cross hatching panels on front walls of a house so we could gun it off to get it flush with rest of masonry before dashing a house, i was at the top of a ladder with a stihl saw above my head and the ladder slips, not much maybe only a couple of inches, still did the job of scaring me senseless!
Finish using grinder to cut tile and put it down upside down while still spinning, falls over and skates across ground and hits my steel toe cap.
sorting through 1200 x 900mm 30mm+ slabs of limestone stacked on end against a wall, pulled a fair few forward to see what was in the stack and balancing them on end, pulled one forward too hard and the whole lot starts to fall towards me, luckily they were stacked in a small room and pinned me against the wall behind me, would have been nasty if they had landed on me.
Thats all i can remember for now but i'm sure there have been a few more!
Available from 
You could've been saying 'Haveagoatstichingthesebackon' 
. By far the scariest one was the stihl saw above my head, i literally couldn't do anything but smoke for the next 3 hours! then we went and bought a snap up tower, possibly the best £750 i ever spent!